Tuesday, October 30, 2018

Alt-Light, Proud Boys, & the Truth

The Proud Boys have been banned from Facebook. Last time I checked, they were tripping over themselves to condemn white nationalism and identitarian politics whenever they got the chance, but they have a habit of beating the shit out of leftists in real life, so I guess that's made them plenty of enemies.

I'm grateful to the alt-light for leading me to the identitarian movement. But in my opinion, despite my affection for figures like Gavin McInnes and Milo, their function as a gateway drug to white identitarianism is the extent of their usefulness. By usefulness, I don’t mean to imply it’s all they’re good for. They do a lot of good in the sense of drawing people’s attention to the decline of society, the migrant crisis in Europe, and more. But I don’t think just drawing attention is particularly useful because they don’t seem to have an answer to how to stop this. Of course identifying as Europeans and moving to secure our nations is the answer, but this is anathema to them.

It’s important here, I think, to point out that contrary to what was written about me in HuffPo, I was not converted to the far right by Trump. I was converted by the hysterical reaction to Trump on behalf of the left.

I actually sat out the 2016 election, for a host of complicated reasons. I was going through a libertarian phase, and the prolife group of which I had been vice president for several years was moving further left. I felt powerless to stop it -- that's a whole other blog post -- and I was steeped in a faction of the pro-life movement that seemed more concerned with leftist pursuits like smashing the patriarchy and creating "racial justice" -- whatever that is -- than actually ending abortion.

Personally, I was beginning my fourth year of infertility. In case you don't know, that's a dark place. I didn't have the mental or emotional energy to do what I really needed to do, which was thoroughly examine the causes I was espousing to make sure they aligned with my principles. There's no excuse, though. I should have faced my doubt and confusion and reached these conclusions then. Instead, faced with an election cycle that I knew was going to force me into a crisis, I tucked tail and fled. I knew I would have to examine why I still called myself a feminist and a libertarian when I was disgusted by almost every feminist and libertarian I talked to. So I retreated, leaving my cognitive dissonance where it was.

This was a big deal, because I was (and am) a culture junkie. I read and wrote about politics and cultural and social issues constantly. Leaving the Internet was no small thing.

I am not proud of the decision to sit out the election cycle, but I can't bring myself to regret it because it gave me the unique opportunity to see SJWs in a stark and revealing light. Here's what happened: the morning after the election I woke up from a literal nightmare about President Hillary. I had fallen asleep on the couch, and I felt disoriented and depressed because I absolutely knew in my heart of hearts that Hillary had won. It was still dark out, but I couldn't go back to sleep. So I sighed, grabbed my Kindle, and went to the bathroom. There I am peeing in the dark, breaking a months-long digital fast to find out who the president is. I took a deep breath and wondered which website to visit. It had been so long that I didn't even remember where to get news. Drudge popped into my head, so I typed in Drudge Report.

And suddenly there it was: hope, backlit on my screen.

Trump was president.

Relief.

I ran upstairs and my husband was sitting up in bed holding his phone. We just looked at each other and smiled.

I got on YouTube, and that's when I realized what Trump and his voters had been up against. The reaction to his election was pure lunacy. Imagine you literally hadn't been online at all for 7 or 8 months, and then all the sudden you logged on the day after the election. I started trying to figure out what was so horrible about Trump, so I started with the "pussy grabbing" audio. It was utterly underwhelming. After a while I gave up trying to understand what all these morons were whining about and just watched Stefan Molyneux's videos where he debunked very charge brought against Trump.

Basically I realized very quickly that in my digital absence, half the country had gone completely batshit.

Right away, I dove back in to consuming massive amounts of cultural and political commentary. I caught up on months of Milo, Ann Coulter, Ben Shapiro, Gavin McInnes, Lauren Southern, and good ol' Stefan. I discovered the YouTube skeptics community, users like Bearing, Blaire White, computing4ever, and more. For a year or so I was having a great time, despite Shapiro's annoying anti-Trumpism, Milo's annoying narcissism, Gavin's annoying horniness, and Ann's annoying... actually nothing. She's perfect.

But it got old. How many "rekt feminist" videos can you watch? How many anti-Islam anti-SJW anti-neo-con videos can you watch? How many libertarian talking points can you hear?

Eventually I started to wonder what these people were doing besides bitching. I noticed that many of them would make super edgy statements -- direct quote from Gavin: "Mexico sucks because of Mexicans." -- only to then trip over each other condemning identitarian politics. For a while I was buying the civic nationalist thing, but then I accidentally watched a video by a user called Way of the World. I don't remember any details about the video, only that it went to the next level. Way of the World didn't condemn identitarianism; on the contrary, he made a brief but potent case that it was the only way Europe and her colonies would survive.

You know the truth when you hear it. There is something in the human heart that is pulled toward it, and responds.

I live in a place that has become more and more Hispanic during my lifetime, to the point that I don't recognize the city where I grew up. The neighborhoods where I spent my childhood look like another country, and the neighborhoods I can afford to live in look and feel like the Third World.

By the time I discovered the videos of Millennial Woes, I had already been booted from the afore-mentioned prolife group for writing about my experience living on a block that was about 95% illegal immigrant. Steve Sailer said political correctness is a war on noticing. I was not allowed to describe the situation in which I spent my life, the litter on my front lawn, the Tejano music pounding through my walls, the language spoken on my street. I was condemned by women who live in majority white neighborhoods, called a racist and accused of hating children and poor people. (Meanwhile, I was poor people.)

Woes' videos walked me out past the point where I could touch the bottom of the pool. I held on and didn't panic and started swimming. I am no longer scared of words like nationalist, identitarian, and that scariest word of all: white.

I tentatively began watching American Renaissance videos. I started watching and reading the work of Jared Taylor, John Derbyshire, Vox Day, Richard Spencer, RamZPaul, Jim Goad, and many more. Occasionally I would (and do) vehemently disagree with these people on certain issues -- abortion and religion most of all -- but their overarching theses had the clear, pure ring of truth. The West is in decline. Europe is being invaded. The native people of Europe are being systematically destroyed. The America founded and built by our ancestors, if we do not take immediate and drastic action, is doomed.

The problem with the alt-light is in order to save their own asses and preserve their fame and their income streams, they repeatedly condemn those further to their right. Now, there are plenty of people on the far right that are totally condemnable, and I have no problem if someone wants to name names and call out undesirables who have made the term "alt-right" synonymous -- to some people -- with embarrassing Nazi LARPers and psychopaths who call for the mass extermination of entire peoples. If you sincerely and literally believe in rounding up and gassing all the Jews, you are the reason why we can't have nice things.

What I do have a problem with is the blanket condemnation of identitarianism, because identitarianism is literally the only hope white people have left. It does not require any hatefulness whatsoever to want your race to continue to exist upon the earth, and there is nothing remotely ugly or wrong about it.

In a sense I understand why they do it. Look what happened to Faith Goldy. Hell, look what happened to me and I was not even remotely famous. I understand they are big names with a lot to lose. But is this about them and their YouTube channel and their fame and their money or is this about the future of the West?

When I was active in the prolife movement, I used to observe the big name activists, the "prolife leaders" who were "prolife famous" and ran big non-profits and went on Fox News all the time, and I would wonder if part of them would be a little disappointed if abortion ended. They'd have to stop being famous activists and go get real jobs.

A dying Europe and America full of foreigners and feminists and trannies is eternal fodder for videos. so what does it matter to the alt-light if the white race dies, as long as their channels stay monetized?

Look, I know some of them have incurred personal risk and suffered loss and gone out on a limb in certain ways. But until they admit what I suspect they secretly know in their heart of hearts -- that identitarianism is the only hope of the Western world -- I will have no choice but to doubt their motives, their usefulness, and their commitment to the truth.

No comments:

Post a Comment